Friday, January 22, 2016
The Sun Signs' Reactions to the Snowstorm
Good evening, my astro-curious lovelies. Once in a blue moon or so, I dispense with my seriousness regarding astrology in favor of something lighter...in the form of sun-sign astrology. This is one of those times. You may well find a grain of truth in this post, but I also advise you to take it with several grains of salt (unless you know your Moon and Rising signs, and can therefore read those descriptions as well for a more accurate reading). You live in one of the Mid-Atlantic states, and a Nor'easter blizzard's a-comin'. However, your reaction to the impending "snowpocalypse" will vary depending on your sign. Aries: Bring that sucker on, baby! I'm gonna take out my SUV or motorcycle out onto the zero-visibility roads and race against myself. Taurus: Let's stay inside all weekend and bake brownies and pies. And eat them. Gemini: After I check in on my neighbors and siblings, I'm going to text/call everyone I know, plus update my Facebook status every hour and post selfies of me making snow angels. Cancer: Get out of my way, I have to run to the supermarket in total panic mode and buy up all the milk, eggs, and bread. Leo: Party! Virgo: This will give me a great opportunity to catch up on some paperwork and also organize my linen closet. Libra: Snowstorms are so romantic when you have someone special to hunker down with. If I don't have a special someone, I have a few hours to find him/her. Scorpio: Snowstorms are so sexy when you can stay in bed and fuck all day and all night, lather, rinse, and repeat. Sagittarius: Now that my flight to Aruba's been canceled, guess I'll Skype with all of my friends in different time zones, start reading that book I got as a holiday present last month, and register for a philosophy, religion, or foreign language course. Oh, and go snowboarding. Capricorn: I need to check on my parents/grandparents to make sure they're okay (if my elderly relatives are all dead, then I'll check on other old folks) and shovel some walkways to make some extra coin. Aquarius: Start a revolution online! Pisces: Snowstorm? There's a snowstorm predicted? Hmm. Well, after I take a ten-hour nap, let's watch DVDs or binge-watch (fill in that TV show) and drink ourselves legless.