Thursday, March 31, 2016
I've been too down in the dumps to post for the past few weeks. The Jupiter-Saturn square, exact last Wednesday, was as shitty as any half-assed astrologer could have predicted: terrorist attacks in Brussels and Pakistan; Donald Trump still hasn't been gonged off The Gong Show. I have not even been keeping track of my own transit-to-natal aspects (though I'm well aware of my progressed Moon in late Cancer, as it affects so many of my natal planets), but I finally determined that transiting Uranus will exactly square my natal Sun in just over two weeks -- on Tax Day. That means I am well within the two-month orb most astrologers would give to such an important, stressful aspect. Well, that sure explains a lot: my nerves, which are even more high-strung than usual; my health, which has fluctuated between so-so and horrible since early February (Uranus rules my 6th-house cusp); my chafing and champing at the bit, feeling in a rut and Kept Down by the Man (and all that implies); and my impatience, which has already reached the boiling point and is about to spill over. I'm in full-on Crisis Mode. I want to relax and I crave sleep, but I am having nightmares that are even more scary than usual. How does this sound for Uranus about to square my Sun: I recently dreamed that it was the aftermath of the world blowing up; four people, including myself, were hurtling through pitch-black outer space, holding on to shards of the exploded planet Earth, headed straight for the sun, which was not even in our galaxy. I did not know who the three other people were. We were close enough to one another to shout things back and forth, but nothing significant was said other that we were all going to die. The sun loomed like a vat of red lava. I may not acquire many new astrology clients by admitting that I am extremely frustrated and unhappy with my life on just about every level, but it's the truth. I wonder if the anger that I am constantly feeling is keeping me alive or if it's part of what's weighing me down. Both ifs might be true. Apparently, if I make any major decisions during this aspect, I will sorely regret them. And yet paralysis is a form of death. Contrary to what you might expect of a canny, intuitive astrologer with Pluto Rising and a Scorpio Moon, I have made a lot of bad decisions in my life. I can advise others pretty well, but this gift does not seem to include giving myself good advice. Unfunnily enough, I often know when I am making a decision that it is not going to end well. But there are times in a person's life when keeping things status quo is not an option. There are times when a person has to make a decisive move, even if it is one of those lose-lose "lesser of two evils" options. As peeved as I am with nearly everyone and everything that is keeping me down, I am most angry with myself for not managing to pull off the whole autonomy trip, the way any intelligent, self-respecting woman living in a first-world country in the twenty-first century is supposed to do. Very soon after the square passes, Uranus will enter my 8th house. Uranus will then retrograde and square my Sun a second time in early December. I haven't checked the date of the third pass, but it will obviously occur sometime in 2017. All this by way of saying that the fun has just begun. I hope I will survive this square. The last time Uranus squared my Sun I was three years old, and I made it out alive, but back then my main concerns were Sesame Street, Play-Doh, and Colorforms. Life isn't quite as simple these days. More's the pity.
Monday, March 7, 2016
I never in a million years thought I'd be defending the recently deceased former First Lady, but in light of four score and many more cruel comments concerning Nancy "Just Say No" Reagan's obituary in the New York Times (this publication is getting tackier all the time: first they bow and scrape before Queen Hillary while marginalizing my homeboy Bernie, now they're opening up an obit to reader comments), I've gotta say it: consulting with an astrologer proves that Nancy Reagan probably did at least one thing right. I say "probably" because I really don't know whether or not Joan Quigley (who died in 2014) was a good astrologer. I'm guessing she didn't entirely suck if Nancy Reagan kept consulting her. It just makes my blood boil that so many people commenting on Nancy Reagan's obit believe that hiring an astrologer is on a par with Nancy's solving America's Growing Drug Problem by telling us all to "Just Say No"; with having a Hollywood background yet willfully ignoring the AIDS crisis for years, even when it socked family friend Rock Hudson; for covering for St. Ronnie's escalating dementia while he was still in office; for graciously helping to usher in the "Greed is good" era, which widened the gap between the have-everythings and the have-nots and turned the proletariat condiment ketchup (as opposed to the yuppified Dijon mustard) into a vegetable. There is a difference between using astrology as a crutch and using it as a road map. It's not a good thing if I excuse my bad behavior by saying, "I have a Scorpio Moon and a Mars-Jupiter square, so I can't help it." The whole point of studying your natal chart is to become super conscious of all your aspects, but especially your crappy ones, so that you can try to rise above them. However, it can save a lot of time, money, and/or aggravation by deciding to avoid traveling, partying, signing a contract, or sitting down to have a nice, rational discussion under a Mercury-Mars square (see my last post). I know this because once upon a time, when I first got into astrology, I refused to schedule my life around planetary aspects. Of course, sometimes you have to sign that contract, take that exam, head out on the highway, get loaded, or try to hash out a sensitive issue with your sweetie, best friend, or boss. Of course you can't always put off something or someone till the aspects improve; life can be very time-sensitive. But sometimes you can delay (or -- horrors! -- Just Say No), and that is what I learned when I kept damning the torpedoes when I didn't have to. So as much as I disapproved of Nancy Reagan when she was First Lady during so-called Morning in America, I cannot on principle object to her consulting an astrologer on a regular basis.
Friday, March 4, 2016
...or maybe they are mine, since it shouldn't matter that I don't know any of the characters who populated this morning's string of nightmares (a wheelchair-bound man whose legs were eventually amputated; a strange family of Australians who only sang, never spoke; a gang of frat boys pigging out at a hotel's breakfast buffet, leaving no food for anyone else). For one thing, I am a writer who constantly conjures up strange characters; for another, as anyone who's ever made even a cursory study of dream interpretation knows, so-called strangers in dreams can symbolize the dreamer. In which case, I really should worry. Yes, my assorted astrologically inclined ruffians and fops, we're just about midway through the annual swim through Pisces, and the seas have been rough thus far. The Sun-Neptune conjunction in Pisces last weekend was utterly wasted on me, since I was too low-energy after the flu to be creative; instead I became obsessed with finding the box containing my framed photographs that I could contribute to my sweetie's imminent "Wall of Fame." (Okay, photographs are certainly Pisces, and my sweetie also happens to be a Pisces). Turns out my framed photos were scattered throughout a few boxes, and many of the frames are not designed for hanging, just propping. But no problemo: once I regain my energy, which should happen any month now, I can buy some frames with hooks at my no-longer-so-local 99-cent-&-up store. Before returning to Piscean issues, I must say that I am disappointed in Mars in the fellow water sign of Scorpio--although to be fair, it more than earned its keep from early January till just after the Sun-Mars square in early February; I got an exciting opportunity as the Sunday Brunch Astrologer at class-act old-school French restaurant Raoul's in Soho. (It's a temporary gig, just through May until the regular Sunday Brunch reader returns from her maternity leave...but everything is temporary, is it not?) But then I got the flu, with Sun squaring my Saturn and Mars opposing it, as well I got more freelance projects than I could handle, and my life was pretty much reduced to three things: Medicine, Work, and Sleep. Whereas I used to require maybe 7 hours of sleep in order to function reasonably well, I now need at least 10. Mars at the Scorpion's tail end will not go gently into that good night before visiting Sagittarius for a few months (yes, Mars will retrograde back into Scorpio in late May, and stay there till early August). This is because we are coming up on a Mercury-Mars square (exact 12:43 a.m. EST) at 29 degrees of Aquarius and Scorpio, respectively. Although it's not likely there will be much respect going on under this square. If at all possible, avoid getting into any arguments; they could turn ugly, even violent. This may mean having to avoid people in general for the rest of the day and evening. Even good friends may have a bad falling-out -- hell, especially good friends. That also goes for lovers, frenemies, coworkers, siblings, neighbors, and the random guy standing behind you at the bodega about to go postal because they're out of his preferred flavor of Fanta. Get the picture? If you can't really hide out or avoid hanging out, it might be a wise idea to hit your inner Mute button -- though if you can still hear, you may get incensed enough to flush that wisdom down the toilet. Back to the Sun in Pisces. This weekend features an icky Sun-Saturn square (exact Sunday 3/6, 1:04 a.m. EST, i.e., Saturday night for many of us) and a potentially much better Sun-Pluto sextile (exact 3/6, 11:36 p.m.). This particular Sun-Saturn square from Pisces to Sagittarius highlights all sorts of conflicts: spiritual, religious, moral, family, career. I daresay it will be an "interesting" (i.e., scandalous and nausea-inducing) weekend in the continuing ridiculousness that is the U.S. election cycle. Especially if you have planets in middle degrees of mutable signs (Pisces, Sagittarius, Gemini, Virgo), the Sun-Saturn square may feel like a crucifixion. I am hoping that the Sun-Pluto sextile 10 hours later will provide the opportunity for a resurrection, for both body and soul. Stay tuned for my Solar Eclipse in Pisces forecast!