What Happens When I Take My Eye off the Astrology Ball

Short answer: It's not pretty.

Long answer: Because I was unusually harried and pressed for time on Saturday afternoon, I failed to look ahead on my trusty astrology software program for the exact timing of two doozies headed my way: transiting Neptune opposing my natal Venus and transiting Mars conjuncting my natal Moon. I knew they were coming; I just didn't know how soon. Like, on Monday. And I was away from my 'pooter for the rest of the weekend.

Oops.

Part I: So Venus Walks into a Bar and Spills Her Drink on Neptune...

I raised a sensitive issue with my sweetie ca. noon yesterday instead of holding my water till the next time we got together. Pobody's nerfect, and a few hours later I made an effort to set things right by articulating myself better, and I think I succeeded. But try telling that to my mortified Venus in Virgo as Neptune exactly opposed it. It was a perfect storm of bad timing, hurt feelings, and yes, opposition. At the very least, I should've taken the Moon in Cancer into account before saying anything; emotions run pretty high during this lunar transit.

Part II: Moon-Mars Meltdown

The Moon may soothe an angry Mars, but the reverse just ain't so. As a Lunar Scorpion, I have no halfway feelings: I am either scaling the heights of ecstasy or plumbing the depths of despair; Zenning out or really pissed off; in hard-core downtime mode or wanting not just to connect, but to merge. Scorpio is an emotional Water sign, yet its Fixed quality makes it far more stubborn than its cousins Pisces and Cancer, and its ruler, Pluto, is a tough negotiator that dwells in the realm of extremes: birth, death, sex, taxes. It's the power behind the throne, not the performer in the spotlight. Mars in Scorpio is all about power and magnetism, and its capacity for getting shit done is truly amazing -- but when it's under stress, front and center is the last place it should be.

So what did I do when, upon returning home and perusing my astro software, I clearly saw that Mars was due to cross over my Moon shortly after 9 p.m.? Under the fog of Neptune still opposing my Venus, I went ahead with my plans to read at a performance series that I already had plenty good reason to think was no longer working out for my particular set of sensibilities -- in fact, with these misgivings in mind, I had already discouraged my sweetie from attending the show. I did not want to attend either, yet I decided that it would be a chicken-poop move to cancel unless I were truly ill, and feeling sad and worried did not count as such in my book. As my little crew of friends were not going to show up till later in the show, when the curator of the show asked me when I wanted to go on, I requested a late slot (which meant very, very close to the exact conjunction between Mars and my Moon). Most of the show went fine; unlike last month, most performers stuck around after their slot to shine; the venue was even air-conditioned (though it wasn't necessary, as NYC had cooled down considerably by sunset).

Then a dyed-redheaded woman, who looked to be smack in the middle of middle age, got up there and sang, then flat-out yelled, incoherent verses while banging a wooden spoon on the table closest to the stage. She reminded me of a mental Ethel Merman (Menthal Merman? Ethal Mental?). Like the Journey song "Don't Stop Believing," she went on, and on, and on, and on...till she managed to clear most of the room. With her bright red hair and headache-inducing racket, she may have been a manifestation of Mars on my Moon; my reaction was quite unusual for performance-mode me. When people understandably began jumping ship, I hot-footed it over to the back of the room to ask the curator of the show if he was planning on yanking this woman off The Gong Show anytime soon. He pointed out that I'd asked to be put on late; I thought, but did not reply, that this preference had nothing to do with the fact that Menthal Merman was causing a mass exodus. I myself nearly fled the venue without reading, but stuck it out and seethed during the next performance. I was most assuredly not "feeling it" when I was finally standing at the mic and peering out at several rows of empty tables and chairs. I apologized to the curator for my Moon-Mars meltdown, but I don't think I sounded too convincing.

And I think I know why.

Mercury Turns Retrograde Just in Time for Turkey Madness

Since mid-October, when Mercury entered Scorpio, Mercury and Venus have been traveling partners, almost but not quite reaching an exact conjunction in Sagittarius on November 12. Since that day, Mercury has been slowing down in its orbit from Earth's perspective, and is about to definitively part ways with Venus, which is nearing the end of Sagittarius.

It has been a lovely, intense combination indeed, with Mercury, the planet of communication, taking its cues from Venus, the planet of love and beauty. Many sweet nothings (or even sweet somethings) have been in the air, or whispered into ears.

However, this sweet-nothings-or-something weather is about to turn. Until December 13, Mercury Retrograde will at the very least encourage reflection over what went down during the past few weeks. More likely, particularly with Venus's exit from expansive, freewheeling, gambling Sagittarius and entrance into calculating, pragmatic Capricorn this Saturday, there may well be second thoughts concerning promises and faith in love. If you have been too optimistic lately, some cold hard facts may bring on a major buzz kill...but without Capricorn (and Saturn) to pull us back to earth, Sagittarius (and Jupiter) would keep expanding and fighting gravity and contradicting our essential earthbound parameters, making the inevitable burst bubble all the more painful. Better to take any necessary medicine willingly, and soon; a small dose of bitterness may save you from having to take a much larger dose later.

With the Moon in secretive, seductive Scorpio, the ideal Thanksgiving would be spent either in private or with your favorite non-platonic person, but if family obligations take over and you cannot make a late date, try for a rain check. (Please note that if you live on the West Coast, the Moon enters Sagittarius by 6 p.m., so you may actually be in a better position to slip off into the night than East Coasters.)

Venus and Mars: Late for a Very Important Date?

(A preface of sorts: I forgot to mention in my last post, all about Friday the 13th, that social historians Neil Howe and William Strauss dubbed what most know as "Generation X" the "13th Generation" back in 1990 [see their exhaustive, sometimes exhausting tome entitled Generations], the year before writer Douglas Coupland arrived on the scene. According to Strauss and Howe, those born in the U.S. between 1961-81 are the 13th generation of Americans--if you count the Puritan Generation, which apparently has many parallels to modern-day Boomers, as the first [methinks it is not a coincidence that Strauss and Howe are Boomers]. Back in the early '90s, 13ers/Xers were generally maligned as materialistic, Halloweenish, stupid slacker barbarians by the media [13 just doesn't get good PR] and more recently have been overshadowed by the younger Millennial Generation. Now let's get on with today's order of business....)


Venus and Mars, Sandro Botticelli, c. 1483.




There is a lovely Venus/Mars conjunction coming up at 2:49 p.m. BST (Brooklyn Summer Time). Friday is ruled by Venus, Venus rules the sign Libra, and the conjunction occurs in at 13 degrees of Libra--a critical degree, which means the double dose of Libra present via Venus and Mars already present is quadrupled.

To quote Libran John Lennon, "Love, love, love...all you need is love."

Venus is stronger than Mars in this conjunction, as Venus and Libra are one and the same, but Mars is in its detriment in Libra. You are therefore more likely to be approached (ladylike Venus) for a romantic interlude or date than to do the approaching (go-for-it Mars) in the next few hours. However, if you are more of an aggressive type, you may want to take advantage of the general passivity. Just don't be too "Mars"--make sure to conquer using pretty words and flowers and a nice-sounding plan for the evening, not by clubbing the dude or dame of your red-hot dreams over the head and dragging him or her back to your cave.

More words of caution: we are approaching the Moon/Venus and Moon/Mars squares (exact at 12:45 and 12:49 p.m. EDT, respectively), and the Moon is in Capricorn--so it would not be the wisest idea to interrupt your intended date's focus on work or other duties until after these squares have passed; literal and figurative heartburn could result.

Oh yes, and Mercury turns the Big R (i.e., retrograde) today at 3:59 p.m. Unexpected delays, losses, or miscommunications could result in your being late for that very important Venus/Mars date, so have a backup plan in mind (e.g., if you miss the movie due to being stuck on the subway from hell) in order to take advantage of the Moon/Mercury trine (exact at 11:49 p.m. EDT).

Much has been made of what a pain in the ass Mercury retrograde is and so I will not bother adding fuel to the fire, but it is worth mentioning that Mercury Rx in Virgo could get especially sticky, as Virgo is ruled by Mercury. Miscommunications are particularly likely in writing, and worrying too much and being too self-critical may have an adverse effect on your health, particularly your digestion. However, because Mercury is retrograde from now till 9/12, you have the chance to extend your summer activities beyond Labor Day...especially if we get August-in-September weather. Unfortunately, your boss or teacher probably will not want to give you that chance, you'll feel the need to prove you're not a space case while your head and heart are still lazing along in Augustville, and if you're un- or underemployed, you'll probably be too depressed to take yourself to the beach.

I only wish I were kidding.